So here we are. We are all pretty desperate at this point. Desperate for peace, answers, healing, sleep and an end to the seemingly endless waves that randomly crash into our boat most every day. Just when you think you have your footing, when the pounding of your heart has slowed and you are trying to fix your eyes on the horizon to navigate out of the danger, another, bigger wave crashes into you knocking you down again, leaving you grappling for a safe handhold and struggling just to breathe.
We found ourselves there again in the dark of the night and all that was left to do was to cry “Mercy!” To cry out to a Father who is neither surprised nor alarmed by this moment and beg him for rescue, for answers, for insight. And suddenly my frantic pleading was stopped short by the voice of One I have heard before.
Peace, be still.
Into my mind came the picture of a boatload of terrified disciples in the midst of their own storm.
Mark 4: 35-41
As evening came, Jesus said to his disciples, “Let’s cross to the other side of the lake.” So they took Jesus in the boat and started out, leaving the crowds behind (although other boats followed). But soon a fierce storm came up. High waves were breaking into the boat, and it began to fill with water.
Jesus was sleeping at the back of the boat with his head on a cushion. The disciples woke him up, shouting, “Teacher, don’t you care that we’re going to drown?”
When Jesus woke up, he rebuked the wind and said to the waves, “Silence! Be still!” Suddenly the wind stopped, and there was a great calm.
My heart was calmed by the undeniable truth that the One who commands the wind and waves is still in control. At any moment He can calm my storm too. A promise that had been forgotten in the midst of my fear.
But then, my heart was rebuked.
Then he asked them, “Why are you afraid? Do you still have no faith?”
Where had my faith gone? Had it been misplaced by hoping for answers from doctors that have not come? Or a false faith in my own strength that if I just read enough or search hard enough I can find the answers myself? This is not my first storm after all. Hadn’t the Lord rescued me before? Hadn’t I rejoiced in the beautiful reality of Psalm 124, freed by His hand alone from the fowler’s snare? Hadn’t I experienced His supernatural healing in my own body and witnessed it in others?
How did I get here so blind and terrified and gasping for air?
Perhaps I had lost sight of who Jesus is.
The disciples were absolutely terrified. “Who is this man?” they asked each other. “Even the wind and waves obey him!”
This quote for Rene Latourelle seems to explain it a bit.
“Jesus is victorious over death, sickness, sin, and the forces of nature, simply because in his very being he is God-among-us. It is not more difficult for him to control the wind and the sea than to prevail over sin and death.”
It is always a struggle for the human mind to grasp even the tiniest understanding of the nature of our
Heavenly Father. Who He is not what I am or will ever be. Even when I am free of my flesh I shall only be able to fall in wonder with the rest of heaven and cry, “Holy, Holy, Holy!”
Lord, help my unbelief. Teach me daily to rely only on you. Help me lay aside the idols of my heart. May I know you more fully as I wait for You to still the wind and the waves.
***this was written by my dearest friend, Heather Peacock.***
